Why We Didn’t Choose a Church Venue

Church weddings are beautiful. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve teared up at watching a beautiful bride strut down the aisle runway. I think there is beautiful architecture inside a church and it can easily be decorated to suit anyone’s need. I think churches are fantastic options for all budgets or couple’s beliefs. Unfortunately, I do not think they are the only traditional option.

For example, I’ve always LOVED destinations or beach weddings. I’ve never been super into weddings—I didn’t have wedding Pinterest boards until I was engaged, but that doesn’t mean I never thought about a general wedding venue concept. I talked to Tom, and he was open to whatever I wanted most. I just figured beaches are cool—that seems to fit into what a “cool” wedding would look like for us. In reality, that just didn’t fit in the time-table and the amount of guests we wanted for creating a beach wedding.

What I did figure out from the process of venue searching is the following: An outdoor wedding venue. I figured it didn’t matter as long as it was outdoor. Tom felt that it fitted us both as a couple, and in the time frame we wanted we searched extensively for a spot that would reflect our start in marriage. In the end, I do find that I keep justifying my decision. As if there’s something terrible about not having it in a church. The statements people make are as follows:

  • You’re not getting married in a church? That’s very non-traditional.
  • Why are you getting married on a farm? You know black people don’t get married on farms.

Let’s address the first statement. For anyone reading this and has seen the wedding website: Off-Beat Brides, and not raised in a strict Christian upbringing, you may seem slightly confuzzled about what some naysayers consider “non-traditional.” The background is (as I’m sure most know). I’m a PK kid. For anyone furiously googling that terminology: AKA: “preacher’s kid” or in my own case, “Pastor’s Kid.”I was born and raised in a church, and as much as the church has made me what I am today (I haven’t in the slightest forgotten that), I want to say that Jesus wouldn’t mind if I brought him with me to let’s say—-some other location.

Now, Let me briefly rant on Christian tradition. I’m going to use a lot of Luvvie’s “Jesus Take the Wheel” and a little bit of Louise:

I’m not going to be briefly mention that Jesus was born in a barn—-and not elaborate further. I’m not even going suggest that in the Old Testament the Israelites were wondering around in the wildness for 40 some odd years….I’m sure absolutely no one got married then—even if we think about the concept that we’re relegating Jesus to some “civilized structure” of 4-walls and steeple seems so unjust. To leave a statement that marriage blessings couldn’t happen outdoors surrounded by the beauty of nature that *cough*God*cough* created and have that recognized—don’t get me started. I don’t have time to get up on a soap box during this process, and I want to make sure that when someone asks me—I can just refer them to this blog post. I don’t have the time to defend my life choices for one measly day, and this is all the energy and effort I’m going to put into it.

Let’s talk about the second statement. My FAVORITEST statement to date: Girl, black people don’t get married at no  farm.


So, Let’s talk about my choice of venue.

Again, there is no need or justification. Yet, I’m always like, apparently, ya’ll need some insight into my eccentricities—-and well jot down those notes:

Let’s Look at Post Family Farms.  It did win this little award last year. Go research it, if you need further clarification.

The best way, I can help you think about what you’re getting yourself into. Is to help you visualize. I’m sure you’re probably thinking this:

When In actuality, it’s more of the following:


Taken from the following site: http://www.reneealeisaphotography.com

Wait until you see the ceremony waterfall site. I’ll just leave that to your imagination. If you haven’t gotten it, you won’t get it—and all I’m going to suggest to you, is breath and try one of these new amazing phrases of Luvvie’s Fix It Jesus.


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